Foreign right over there Lewis Hello Steven oh Lois Lois we have two delightful people coming back on the show tonight one uh just one just a lovely person to be with let alone a great artist James Taylor is going to be.

Here yeah and just a incredibly talented thoughtful well-informed young lady Eva Longoria is going to be out here got a new show yeah folks if you watch this show you know I spend most my time over there in the news kitchen simmering the day's freshest story chicken and the most.

Topical coconut milk then adding the newest fear lime leaves and a dash of tiparo Nam PLA and palm sugar to serve you the perfectly balanced Tom cogai that is my monologue but sometimes just sometimes folks I wake up on the scoop of a backhoe on a deserted construction site toss half a discarded bologna sandwich.

And the swill from a crumpled can of Mr Pibb into a crack Paint Bucket add some grass clippings and leave it in the sun to offer you the bootleg trash gumbo of news that is my segment meanwhile the filter through which I see the world Thomas.

Meanwhile the National Park Service is warning that despite what you may have heard in some old jokes you should never push a slower friend down in a bear encounter that notice from renowned Wildlife expert your slowest friend meanwhile over half a dozen sheep recently escaped a slaughterhouse in New.

Jersey the Escape happened because the official responsible for counting the Sheep The Slaughterhouse kept falling asleep meanwhile we all know this favorite senior Pastime pickleball is taking over the country which has led to countless Turf battles over tennis court space and now the great pickleball War has reached.

The DC area Virginia's Arlington County wants to build nine new pickleball courts but homeowners in the area hate the idea so much they've started Distributing Flyers that accuse pickleball players of hijacking tennis and basketball courts bullying children and urinating in public come on seniors pickleball is not an excuse to urinate.

In public that's Aqua aerobics meanwhile calm weight a little fun weight meanwhile after legal challenges brought by swiss cheese makers a U.S court has ruled that American-made cheese can be called gruyere while craft singles must now be correctly labeled as plastic bath mat soaked in yellow.

Meanwhile we have some breaking news about the breaking of a royal tradition because it's been announced that the holy anointing oil for King Charles III's coronation will not contain the intestinal wax of sperm whales or civet secretions what that makes no sense if a king's head isn't greased with whale intestine wax.

And secretions from a nocturnal tropical rodent but I'm sorry but hereditary ruler starts to sound kind of stupid the sacred the sacred the sacred head goo traditionally contains oil from the glands of small mammals such as civets and ambergris a waxy substance from the intestines of sperm whales that is called chrism oil.

But in this case Buckingham Palace is using a civet and whale free alternative called I Can't Believe It's Not chrism we'll be right back with James Taylor thank you
Meanwhile… Turf battles over space for Pickleball courts have erupted nationwide, and England’s new king is opting for a cruelty-free coronation.
#Colbert #Comedy #Meanwhile #Pickleball


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Stephen Colbert brings his signature satire and comedy to THE LATE SHOW with STEPHEN COLBERT, the #1 show in late night, where he talks with an eclectic mix of guests about what is new and relevant in the worlds of politics, entertainment, business, music, technology and more. Featuring bandleader Louis Cato and “THE LATE SHOW band,” the Peabody Award-winning and Emmy Award-nominated show is broadcast from the historic Ed Sullivan Theater. Stephen Colbert took over as host, executive producer and writer of THE LATE SHOW on Sept. 8, 2015.